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" Do you want me to talk to her?" Oh, would you? Maybe a man can get through to her."Feeling foolish in my robe, I proceed to knock on the door."Danielle, it is Leigh, your next door neighbor, I am coming in so don't bean me with an ashtray."Slowly opening the door, I peer in looking for Danielle, alert for anything whistling through the air. All is quiet on the battlefront. Slipping in and then closing the door, I spot Danielle watching me. Her eyes are ablaze with fire. She, like her mother, must have been preparing for bed as she is dressed in a white two-piece baby doll type of nighty. For one so young, she is well endowed, must be her mother's genes. The top barely covers her budding breasts; the bottom hasn't got much more material than a small handkerchief. By the look on her face, she realizes the power she has over men."What do you want? Where is mom?" Your mom is in my apartment, I am here hopefully to help. I thought maybe you would like a man to talk to, your mom said you. ”I’m like, “Alright. Do you like porn?”He goes, “Yeah, I love porn. You know that.”I’m like, “Do you only watch scenes with two women together?”“No, I watch a man and a woman making love.”“Do you like the guy to have a small, half-flaccid penis?”He goes, “No, I like big, hard, throbbing cocks.”“Why are you a vegetarian?” I asked him. And it wasn’t even because meat is bad for you.He said that “raising cattle was bad for the planet -- with cow flatulence in the ozone and the clearing of land for the raising of cattle. What are you doing to help the environment?”“I’m eating the cow.”On Deer Hunting:If you ever miss one, it’s because the bullet’s moving too fast.Slow the bullet down to 55 miles an hour, put some headlights and a little horn on it -- the deer will actually jump in front of the bullet.There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his watermelon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After.
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